Some Days

It moves through her, and she becomes a piece in the liquid puzzle of continuing.

Melting into May.

Some days, sometimes, I feel so unskilled when I am working.  This used to discourage me. Sometimes to the point where I would just discard what I was working on.  But over the years I came to define skill as, well, simply the patience for the time it takes.

I stopped liking this along the way.  I couldn't help but continue in some sort of frenzy, not able to deal with original simple form, because it was too blue. And lonely.  I suppose I just wanted her (me, you know) to melt into everything around here,  a kind of connection.  To soften her edge.  And I needed new eyes.

It seemed to fight my efforts.  I was trying to change her too fast.

But now it's ok.  I have regained my pace. And she will take the form of how it went and how it will go.  Carry it all.

I can melt into going.

Accept the beauty in that.

A Maggie moment

Meanwhile,  I have come to love Maggie even more for the way she seems to bloom  anytime she needs to and never seems to care about schedule. Suddenly, one more blossom.  Just one.  I need no "why?".

 

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Categories: design mending, flow, sempathetic evolution, Stray Selves SeriesTags: ,
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45 comments

  1. Jane

    Dear Jude,

    Aaah breathe, perfection is merely a summit that eludes the many because one compares themselves with the nimble fingers of centuries of tradition. I see your continental darned cloth there and understand the dilemma yet comparing what you do to the age old traditional stitching is like comparing Picasso to Titian. They are completely different in their skillset, therefore each unique unto themselves. It is a woman’s trait to feel less than in the presence of greatness, but never see their own worth as being truly awesome. Your story cloths are unique and hold so much memory and communication, just looking at them teaches us to feel or awareness. The darned cloth holds stitches well executed but with little story projected that we can read. Know your work is worthy.
    I AM ENOUGH.

  2. jess

    Trees are aware of what goes on around them, and I’d imagine they practice a sypmathetic response and evolution… but I also wonder if a sense of self expression, pride, or sympathy come into play in some great or small way.

    Seeing her layers, I love it.

  3. Caro

    “I tryed to feel her too fast”
    Oh yes, the time it takes…..so much truth in that on so many
    levels.
    Maggie knows

  4. Jen

    Your stray Self appears betwixt & between…
    –how brave you are in your honesty, Jude!
    I think we all feel these things (I know I Do!)
    & Yay, Maggie; becuz she can!

    • jude

      I think there are so many whys that exist at the same time, it becomes useless on some days to even try to go there.

  5. Elizabeth Godin

    As I take in this new piece .. I find a sadness in her eyes.. I sense a acceptance of change. Perhaps a meeting of feelings and of mind.
    She is steadfast and self assured .. sharing her unspoken determination to continue the story.

  6. I felt over the last year 2023, that I really was in control of my work. I was walking the dog vs the dog walking me. Then in 2024 the bottom fell out, the dog bit me, and I am left feeling incompetent. I thought this whole rearrangements of the planets would strengthen me. Instead it scrambled. And maybe in the scramble that will make the work stronger. But the process hurts. Melting helps. Moving forward too. And faith.

    • jude

      the whole concept of control is so confusing… in the way it can be a decision that could be either holding on or letting go.
      I guess process is a kind of exercise. Today it felt like stretching.

  7. Go Maggie, that is sweet. I can so relate to not feeling skilled when working, especially when it comes to watercolor. I like that you’ve given the self more ocean. I, too, miss the ocean, but it is SO inside me after many, many years living close to it.

  8. kirsten

    this sounds like my weekend which i have spent trying to get the treadle tie-ups to my countermarch loom properly done. ended up breaking one cord which i think I can repair without buying more cord.

    I, too, was feeling so unskilled!!! but my patience seemed to be okay…….

  9. Nancy D

    I am glad to see you melting into what will be. That, in itself, is an art. Wishing you Maggie’s Spirit … She’s a beaut.💞

  10. Pam S.

    I think most of us don’t like how what we are trying make is going in the beginning… I know I have that feeling all the time! and thankfully I’m to stubborn to quit! I’m glad you didn’t she is even more beautiful 💙💙💙

  11. Louisr

    She seems to have knowing & sad eyes. Sometimes we have trouble accepting what is coming through us via art.
    Always a journey, isn’t it? Thanks Jude for your honesty ♥️

  12. Sharon McDonnell

    “….sometimes, I feel so unskilled when I am working.” Oh dear me, this is exactly it. It makes me feel better that you are saying this. I bring all the doubts and questions with me and the little judgements that, upon examination, are tedious and not true. In one of your videos you mentioned that you set things aside. This statement was a freedom for me.

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